Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Wakeboarding outing

with my JC friends turned out to be another of our Bridge sessions, sigh. Well, not really sigh- Bridge is always nice. =)

Lightning over the sea near Johor made it seem quite impossible to wakeboard, thus the backup plan of Bridge (I always carry a pack of cards to play with 'em Bridge-fanatics). Hmm... in fact, Bridge seems to be the backup plan of choice among most of my friends.... That doesn't say very much about my choice of friends, eh?

Fun way to play bridge - SAF Rank System
Much as some of us show great distaste to this great organisation of the nation, we find that there are indeed some useful knowledge imparted to us by it. The SAF Rank System, for one, is one such knowledge - without it, we wouldn't have come up with such a ludicrous game.... how does it work then?

Brief knowledge of the great SAF Rank System:
The ranks are ....
(smallest fry)
Recruit
Private
Lance Corporal
Corporal
3rd Sergeant (the start of stripes on sleeves)
2nd Sergeant
1st Sergeant
Staff Sergeant
Master Sergeant
Non-commissioned Officers [no need to salute]
2nd Warrant Officer
1st Warrant Officer
Master Warrant Officer
Senior Warrant Officer
Commissioned Officers [invested by President, must salute]
2nd Lieutenant
Full Lieutenant
Captain (if Senior Warrant Officer goes for course, can become Captain)
Major (the first rank with crabs on ampulet)
Lieutenant-Colonel
Colonel
Brigadier General (the first rank with stars on ampulet)
Major General
Lieutenant General
(biggest shot)
.... and that's all the knowledge from SAF that we need for the game.

First, we get 2 objects of very great significance to no one (handphones will suffice very well when nothing else is at hand), and set them as the losers' tokens. This means that the loser pair after each game will hold on to these 2 tokens, one each.

The objective of the game is to NOT hold onto these now accursed tokens. Holding onto any one of the two tokens for a consecutive term will result in your PROMOTION up the ranking system, a cruel fate that everyone wishes to avoid.

You can start the game with everyone as cao recruits or bloody privates, and the goal is for any 1 of the 4 Bridge players to raise through the ranks and become a BG or MG or LG (depending on a predefined highest rank attainable) . Strategies of the game will thus involve non-token-holders trying to make token-holders hold onto their tokens, while token-holders try to get rid of them. Note that this may very well mean you might want to try and lose the game (if you have a token-holding partner, and you're not currently holding onto a token), just to make your partner rise in ranks.

On getting the highest rank, everyone else must perform a full salutation/investiture ceremony to congratulate the longsuffering officer, before breaking up for supper at Mac's or kopitiam.

Other rules/qwerks of the game:
1) The individual shuffling and dealing cards will be the lower ranked of the losing pair in the previous game.
2a) Verbal abuses from a higher ranked officer to a lower ranked soldier is always permissible.
2b) Verbal abuses from a lower ranked soldier to a higher ranked officer is always a chargeable offence.
3) The higher ranked officer is always right, in all situations. (Even when he's wrong.)
4) The Staff Sergeant (and above) can hold Staff Parades to tekan the lower ranked soldiers.
5) If you rise through the ranks very fast, you can be termed a 'high flyer', a SAFOS Scholar, or SAF Local Scholar, depending on your speed of promotion.
6) Lower ranked soldier must always address Officers as 'Sir', and try their hands at bootlicking.

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